Wednesday 13 April 2016
Dean Saunders: Right Winger?
Former Wales Intenational Dean Saunders has made what appears to be a nazi salute. He was in the studio analysing tonight's Benfica v Bayern match in the Champions league when he made the salute as he described the Bavarian team's first goal.
Friday 25 March 2016
God Save the Queen of certain bits of Ulster
I went to the Wales v Northern Ireland football match in Cardiff last night. The night was wet and cold, the football was wet and cold but I remained warm due to judicious use of thermal underwear.
Sitting next to me were a family of five: three generations of red and green clad Welsh people. It seemed that the younger members of the group were new to live football but the grandfather was clearly a veteran attendee.
As the teams lined up before the match kicked off, we all stood awaiting the anthems. Northern Ireland's is the sad God Save the Queen, and once this fact had sunk in (after about four chords) the booing began.
I would have booed too, if we had been playing England, but I thought that the Ulster lads deserved better than that from me. Still, it cheered me slightly to know that many Welsh fans responded in Pavlovian manner to the dreadful dirge.
What I was not prepared for was, turning to my left, seeing the proud patriarch in his red hat lustily singing along to the English/British anthem. I caught his eye and he smiled, raising his voice to belt out the final line: "Go-odd Saaaaaaave the Queeeeeeeeen!"
I kept quiet but for fuck's sake, what was he thinking? This isn't ling-along-afucking-Max! Our pre-match anthems are our war-cries, our battle shibboleths. You sing the other team's anthems and they hear more support in the stadium than is actually present.
And lo-and-behold, what happened? The Northern Ireland team scored their first away friendly goal for years and were on course for their first such victory in over a decade. That quisling grandad was bailed out by Simon Church's penalty, converted in the last minute and securing a well-deserved draw.
Next time you are thinking of singing the opposition's anthem - don't. Keep yer fucking mouth shut in Lens and make sure you learn the words to OUR anthem.
Sitting next to me were a family of five: three generations of red and green clad Welsh people. It seemed that the younger members of the group were new to live football but the grandfather was clearly a veteran attendee.
As the teams lined up before the match kicked off, we all stood awaiting the anthems. Northern Ireland's is the sad God Save the Queen, and once this fact had sunk in (after about four chords) the booing began.
I would have booed too, if we had been playing England, but I thought that the Ulster lads deserved better than that from me. Still, it cheered me slightly to know that many Welsh fans responded in Pavlovian manner to the dreadful dirge.
What I was not prepared for was, turning to my left, seeing the proud patriarch in his red hat lustily singing along to the English/British anthem. I caught his eye and he smiled, raising his voice to belt out the final line: "Go-odd Saaaaaaave the Queeeeeeeeen!"
I kept quiet but for fuck's sake, what was he thinking? This isn't ling-along-afucking-Max! Our pre-match anthems are our war-cries, our battle shibboleths. You sing the other team's anthems and they hear more support in the stadium than is actually present.
And lo-and-behold, what happened? The Northern Ireland team scored their first away friendly goal for years and were on course for their first such victory in over a decade. That quisling grandad was bailed out by Simon Church's penalty, converted in the last minute and securing a well-deserved draw.
Next time you are thinking of singing the opposition's anthem - don't. Keep yer fucking mouth shut in Lens and make sure you learn the words to OUR anthem.
Saturday 12 March 2016
Eddie Jones: Eggman
Rugby Union: England narrowly beat Wales today, 25-21, in their Six Nations clash in London. It was a sobering yet stirring experience for the TV audience in Wales, a loss but not the thrashing that loomed when England went 19-0 up a few minutes into the second half.
Apart from Wales' three tries, the best bit of watching Wales lose was seeing England coach Eddie Jones' face when Wales scored their third try. The prospect of his England team losing to its bitterest rivals, in what would have been the greatest comeback in the history of the sport, shit the poor Aussie up so badly that he looked like he was going to cry.
Is this a pyrrhic defeat? I'm not sure, but the knowledge that our boys must have, literally, made hundreds or even thousands of English rugby fans crap their pants is something that should be celebrated.
Apart from Wales' three tries, the best bit of watching Wales lose was seeing England coach Eddie Jones' face when Wales scored their third try. The prospect of his England team losing to its bitterest rivals, in what would have been the greatest comeback in the history of the sport, shit the poor Aussie up so badly that he looked like he was going to cry.
Is this a pyrrhic defeat? I'm not sure, but the knowledge that our boys must have, literally, made hundreds or even thousands of English rugby fans crap their pants is something that should be celebrated.
Thursday 10 March 2016
Another Fat Head bites the dust
This week the UK Anti-Doping Agency (UKAD) announced that yet another Welsh rugby player has been banned for taking performance-enhancing substances. This time it was Bargoed Rugby Club's Adam Buttifant (great name: "'Ow's you butti" "Fantastic butt"), a 19-year-old who had been on the Dragons' books as a youngster.
Young Buttifant has foolishly been taking anabolic steroids, presumably to increase his strength, and will now have to live with a two-year ban from the sport.
Of course, this kind of behaviour is cheating but I feel that the self-obsessed, body-conscious youth of Wales are unwitting victims of a whole host of negative circumstances.
Rugby in Wales was formerly played by wiry men who were either steel workers or miners, men as hard as iron and dense as anthracite. Phil Bennett and Gerald Davies more than made up in skill and speed what they lacked in bulk. Today's rugby players, regardless of height, are almost uniformly squat or stocky.
What's more, those disappeared blue collar jobs gave men the chance to prove themselves, physically, day after day, and your team mates down the rugby club would be your team mates at the pit. What have today's young men got by way of comparison? Call centres to work in, atomised social lives and a social and cultural milieu that celebrates vanity, individualism and spurious, ephemeral popularity.
All the same, taking any performance-enhancing substance should fill a sportsman with shame; there are enough examples of ruined lives (Lance Armstrong, Ben Johnson) to indicate that cheating the competition is ultimately cheating yourself too.
What's more upsetting for me is seeing the bulked up morons raising hell in our towns and cities at night. Sure, certain other parts of the UK have their share of "roiders" but the sheer volume of these puffed up, overgrown kids polluting our pubs and clubs in Wales has to be seen to be believed.
We need to educate our youngsters - show them pictures of the damage caused by steroids to abusers' bodies. Shrivelled dicks, tiny balls, enlarged hearts - whatever.
Let's put a stop to these apes with an overblown sense of entitlement and inflated self-worth clogging up our nightlife.
Rant over.
Young Buttifant has foolishly been taking anabolic steroids, presumably to increase his strength, and will now have to live with a two-year ban from the sport.
Of course, this kind of behaviour is cheating but I feel that the self-obsessed, body-conscious youth of Wales are unwitting victims of a whole host of negative circumstances.
Rugby in Wales was formerly played by wiry men who were either steel workers or miners, men as hard as iron and dense as anthracite. Phil Bennett and Gerald Davies more than made up in skill and speed what they lacked in bulk. Today's rugby players, regardless of height, are almost uniformly squat or stocky.
What's more, those disappeared blue collar jobs gave men the chance to prove themselves, physically, day after day, and your team mates down the rugby club would be your team mates at the pit. What have today's young men got by way of comparison? Call centres to work in, atomised social lives and a social and cultural milieu that celebrates vanity, individualism and spurious, ephemeral popularity.
All the same, taking any performance-enhancing substance should fill a sportsman with shame; there are enough examples of ruined lives (Lance Armstrong, Ben Johnson) to indicate that cheating the competition is ultimately cheating yourself too.
What's more upsetting for me is seeing the bulked up morons raising hell in our towns and cities at night. Sure, certain other parts of the UK have their share of "roiders" but the sheer volume of these puffed up, overgrown kids polluting our pubs and clubs in Wales has to be seen to be believed.
We need to educate our youngsters - show them pictures of the damage caused by steroids to abusers' bodies. Shrivelled dicks, tiny balls, enlarged hearts - whatever.
Let's put a stop to these apes with an overblown sense of entitlement and inflated self-worth clogging up our nightlife.
Rant over.
Tuesday 8 March 2016
Labour's sad Wales Bill
Yesterday, Carwyn Jones, the leader of the failed Welsh Government, unveiled an alternative Wales Bill, nattily named the Government and Laws in Wales Draft Bill
This was a hugely belated response to the Westminster Tories' own, risible Wales Bill, (published in March 2015) which aimed to give Wales control over taxis, harbours, voting ages and medium-sized power stations. This Bill is now being rejigged.
The main proposal in the Welsh Government's plan is to create a separate legal jurisdiction in Wales, thus ending 500 years of "EnglandandWales" lawmaking.
The Labour party had previously ruled out a Welsh legal jurisdiction but under the new plans policing and criminal justice would be devolved after 2026 - so no rush then.
With an Assembly election imminent, this move by Carwyn and co smacks of desperation. They surely hope that they can pull some votes from Plaid, and be seen to be influencing the rejigging of the Tories' own sad Bill.Why in the fuck, though, has it taken them 12 months to come up with a rehash of the Silk Commission's proposals?
Mike at Syniadau has the answer: now that Plaid Cymru have given up campaigning for Welsh independence, Carwyn has stolen their thunder on their USP - more devolution for Wales.
The real tools for creating an independent state, such as control over monetary, fiscal and tax policy, benefits, foreign policy and defence, have, it would seem, dropped entirely out of Plaid's purview. The party is so focused on social justice - they proudly announced last April that they were the first party in Wales to have a policy on transexual/transgender issues in their manifesto - that their very raison d'être has disappeared up Leanne Wood's fundament.
Leanne herself seems way more bothered about maintaining the UK's position in the EU. Wales gets around £300 million a year (roughly 0.5% of GDP) from Brussels in convergence funding, but spunks it all on shitty third-sector projects like this. We could have spent those billions on building a north-south dual carriageway and a north-south railway, joining our nation and opening areas up for investment FROM Wales IN Wales. But we didn't.
Don't these clowns understand: part of the reason that support for independence is so low is that Plaid are not only failing to campaign for it, they are actively pooh-poohing it? Great way to consign your organisation to the dustbin of history, ass-hats.
So Labour's sad Wales Bill will probably represent a consensus. AMs of every party will pat themselves on the back once Welsh Secretary Stephen Crabb returns with a new, slightly less risible Bill. The AMs will tell themselves that their party has won the battle for a "lasting devolution settlement for Wales".
I say to these jokers, "what has Wales won?" And the answer will be "only slightly more than FUCK ALL, you self-serving wankers"
Rant over, and out.
This was a hugely belated response to the Westminster Tories' own, risible Wales Bill, (published in March 2015) which aimed to give Wales control over taxis, harbours, voting ages and medium-sized power stations. This Bill is now being rejigged.
The main proposal in the Welsh Government's plan is to create a separate legal jurisdiction in Wales, thus ending 500 years of "EnglandandWales" lawmaking.
The Labour party had previously ruled out a Welsh legal jurisdiction but under the new plans policing and criminal justice would be devolved after 2026 - so no rush then.
With an Assembly election imminent, this move by Carwyn and co smacks of desperation. They surely hope that they can pull some votes from Plaid, and be seen to be influencing the rejigging of the Tories' own sad Bill.Why in the fuck, though, has it taken them 12 months to come up with a rehash of the Silk Commission's proposals?
Mike at Syniadau has the answer: now that Plaid Cymru have given up campaigning for Welsh independence, Carwyn has stolen their thunder on their USP - more devolution for Wales.
The real tools for creating an independent state, such as control over monetary, fiscal and tax policy, benefits, foreign policy and defence, have, it would seem, dropped entirely out of Plaid's purview. The party is so focused on social justice - they proudly announced last April that they were the first party in Wales to have a policy on transexual/transgender issues in their manifesto - that their very raison d'être has disappeared up Leanne Wood's fundament.
Leanne herself seems way more bothered about maintaining the UK's position in the EU. Wales gets around £300 million a year (roughly 0.5% of GDP) from Brussels in convergence funding, but spunks it all on shitty third-sector projects like this. We could have spent those billions on building a north-south dual carriageway and a north-south railway, joining our nation and opening areas up for investment FROM Wales IN Wales. But we didn't.
Don't these clowns understand: part of the reason that support for independence is so low is that Plaid are not only failing to campaign for it, they are actively pooh-poohing it? Great way to consign your organisation to the dustbin of history, ass-hats.
So Labour's sad Wales Bill will probably represent a consensus. AMs of every party will pat themselves on the back once Welsh Secretary Stephen Crabb returns with a new, slightly less risible Bill. The AMs will tell themselves that their party has won the battle for a "lasting devolution settlement for Wales".
I say to these jokers, "what has Wales won?" And the answer will be "only slightly more than FUCK ALL, you self-serving wankers"
Rant over, and out.
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